Motherhood doesn’t always look the way you imagined it would.

If your child lives primarily with their other parent, or you’re navigating a difficult co-parenting arrangement, you may be carrying feelings that can be difficult to talk about - guilt, grief, shame, anger, uncertainty, or even relief.

I understand some of this personally.

As a mum with lived experience of my child living primarily with their other parent, I understand some of the complicated emotions that can come with spending time apart from your child.

Your circumstances won’t be exactly the same as mine, and I won’t assume that I know how you feel. But you won’t need to explain to me why this kind of motherhood experience can be complicated.

You might be:

• Questioning whether you are a “good enough” mum.

• Carrying guilt, shame or self-blame.

• Worrying about how other people see you.

• Grieving the motherhood you thought you would have.

• Navigating difficult co-parenting or family relationships.

• Struggling with the time you spend apart from your child.

• Feeling anxious, low, overwhelmed or less confident.

• Wondering who you are outside of being a mum.

What might we explore together?

When motherhood hasn't looked the way you thought it would, it can be difficult to separate how you really feel from everything you've come to believe you should feel.

In counselling, we might explore where some of those expectations came from. What have you learnt about what a "good mum" is supposed to look like? How much of the guilt or shame you're carrying belongs to your own feelings, and how much comes from worrying about what other people might think?

We can also gently approach the parts of your story that may feel difficult to talk about, without expecting you to justify your choices or circumstances.

Over time, our work might involve finding a way of understanding your story that feels true to you, developing greater compassion for yourself, and becoming more able to tolerate the fact that not everyone will understand your life or the choices you've made.

The aim isn't to convince you that difficult feelings don't matter. It's to help you become more able to trust yourself, live alongside what you cannot change, and decide what matters to you now.

You are a mum — and you are also a whole person.

Motherhood can be an incredibly important part of who you are, without being the only part.

Counselling can give you space to explore your experiences as a mum alongside your own needs, relationships, hopes, values and sense of who you are.

Together, we can make room for the difficult feelings while also reconnecting with parts of yourself that may have become harder to hear.

You don't have to explain or justify your situation before getting in touch.

If something you've read here feels familiar, you're welcome to arrange a free introductory call. You can tell me a little about what you're looking for, ask me anything you'd like to know, and get a sense of whether talking with me feels right.